So, anyway, Donald Trump was burned to death in a fire. The city ME called Eric and Don, Jr. to come down to the morgue to try to identify the body. The medical examiner had his assistant roll the body tray out of the fridge, and then the assistant lifted the sheet from the face of the body.
The two sons looked. Eric said: “Jeez, I don’t know. He’s really cooked.”
Don said: “Hey, I know, roll him over.”
Eric said: “Yeah, roll him over.”
Mystified, the ME nodded to his assistant, who rolled the body over.
Eric and Don looked closely at the corpse’s butt.
Don said: “Nope, that’s not Dad.”
Eric said: “Yep, he ain’t Dad.”
The ME asked: “How can you be so sure from looking at his posterior?
Don said: “Dad had two rectums.”
Eric said: “Yeah, he did.”
The ME asked: “I never heard of a man having two rectums. Are you sure about that?”
Eric said: “Well, we never saw them, but every time we went out to eat, people would say: ‘Hey look, there’s Trump with the two assholes!'”
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Hans Howe 
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