Why is Bigfoot eating bagels?

bigfoot-crossingStudy:“‘Bigfoot’ DNA sequenced in upcoming genetics study.” In it, Dr. Melba S. Ketchum explained that in a study that would soon be released, she would prove that male, non-human primates mated with early human females to create a line of Bigfoots, which her study genetically identifies as an “unknown hominid hybrid species in North America.” LINK

And don’t we all know several specimens?